Honest definitions from work and life

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  • Stock market

    noun

    Globally connected roller coasters operated by the governments, influenced by climates, microorganisms, solar flares, asteroids, the Suez Canal, and auditors, where everyone like you and me are strapped in, eyes closed, and screaming about our life savings while trying to convince each other it’s all part of the fun.

    karthik on July 27, 2024

  • Bull market

    noun

    A period in the stock market when your significant other, friend, neighbour, mom, dad, hair stylist, his assistant, colleague, and even those five strangers you chat with in your daily commute suddenly see you as a genius in global economics and ask you for stock tips without you having to drop them first.

    karthik on July 27, 2024

  • Bull market

    noun

    A rare and magical few days in the stock market when your stock prices rally, and you finally get to daydream about that Lamborghini, retirement, and all the travel you always wanted.

    Bull market: "I got you brother! Your early retirement is early!"
    Government entered the chat
    Government added Inflation and Capital gains tax to the chat
    Bear market: is typing …

    karthik on July 27, 2024

  • Government

    noun

    A scam where elected scums promise to fix everything—roads, healthcare, the economy—but end up siphoning everyone’s salary and giving it to the richest, keeping you broke and distracted with riots, statues, global summits, drone strikes, and expensive war movies you can’t afford.

    karthik on July 27, 2024

  • Scope creep

    noun

    The treachery committed by the creeps from the product and the management team with relentless "just one more thing" additions to your well-planned Agile project to turn it into a Lord of The Rings trilogy.

    Disgruntled Project Manager: "Yesterday, our plan was to build an expense tracking feature. Today, it’s evolved into predicting the future of global markets. Who knows, tomorrow we might be tackling time travel! Scope creep needs to stop!"

    karthik on July 27, 2024